Category: Men Vs. Women Jokes

REASONS WHY DOGS ARE BETTER THAN WOMEN:
-Dogs don't cry.
-Dogs love it when your friends come over.
-Dogs think you sing great.
-A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.
-Dogs don't expect you to call when you’re running late.
-The later you are, the more excited a dog is to see you.
-Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.
-Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
-Dogs don't mind if you give their offspring away.
-Dogs can appreciate excessive body hair.
-Anyone can get a good-looking dog.
-If a dog's gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it.
-Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor.
-Dogs never need to examine the relationship.
-A dog's parents never visit.
-Dogs love long car trips.
-Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
-Dogs don't hate their bodies.
-Dogs never criticize.
-Dogs never expect gifts.
-Dogs don't worry about germs.
-Dogs don't want to know about every other dog you've had.
-Dogs like to do their snooping outside, as opposed to in your desk or wallet.
-Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives.
-Dogs would rather have you buy them a hamburger dinner instead of a lobster one.
-You never have to wait for a dog.
-Dogs are ready to go 24 hours a day.
-Dogs have no use for flowers, cards, or jewelry.
-Dogs never want foot rubs.
-Dogs aren't catty.

HOW DOGS AND WOMEN ARE ALIKE:
-Both look stupid in hats.
-Both can eat 5 pounds of chocolate at one sitting.
-Neither understands football.
-Both are good at pretending to listen to every word you say.
-Neither believes that silence is golden.
-Both constantly want back rubs.
-Neither can balance a checkbook.
-You can never tell what either of them is thinking.

WHY WOMEN ARE BETTER THAN DOGS:
-Women look good in sweaters.
-Women leave the room to pass gas.

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