A woman in a coma was receiving a sponge bath from the nurses. While washing the lady's private area, they both noticed that the heart monitor and brain monitor jumped. To make sure it wasn't a coincidence they tried again and both machines jumped again. Quickly one nurse ran out to the lady’s husband and said "Sir, I know this sounds unorthodox, but we believe that some oral sex will help you wife to come out of the coma"
Q: How do you tell when you are at a gay picnic?
A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers. When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen. He went back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head without even looking and fired a shot into the ceiling. "Which one of you sidewinders stole my horse?" he yelled forcefully. No one answered. "All right, I'm gonna have another beer, and if my horse isn’t back outside by the time I finish, I'm gonna do what I dun in Texas! And I don't like to have to do what I dun in Texas!" Some of the locals shifted restlessly. The man, true to his word, had another beer, walked outside, and his horse had been returned to the post. He saddled up and started to ride out of town. The bartender wandered out of the bar and asked, "Say partner, before you go, what happened in Texas?" The cowboy turned back and said, "I had to walk home."
A few days after Christmas a mother was working in the kitchen, listening to her son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son say, " All you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off now cause this is the last stop. And all you sons of bitches, who are getting on, get your asses in the train cause we're leaving.
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Date created May-17-2001